Day 5: My Proudest Moment (Day 5 of 30 Day Blogging Challenge)

My proudest moment was when my oldest daughter graduated from the NJ CARES Program.

We had been through Hell as a family after she shared she was sexually abused. DYFS (NJ’s CPS) substantiated the abuse, and the prosecutor began an investigation. My daughter had a nervous breakdown and, at the age of 5, had to be an inpatient at a psychiatric facility. She went through bouts of being suicidal. My days consisted of taking my daughter to therapy and dealing with legal proceedings, and my nights consisted of nightmares or insomnia. Days seemed to blur together, and there was no end in sight.

NJ CARES is a program opened to any child once DYFS substantiates abuse. We went once a week, and my daughter’s father and I would meet with the therapist first, and then she’d go in on her own, and then the family would meet together at the end. The program took 4 to 6 months to complete, and when we did complete it, the therapist had a small graduation party for my daughter in her office.

At the graduation, I realized how much progress my daughter had made over the past several months, progress that was promised by the professionals but I never believed it would come. She was more playful, more childlike again, and she was enjoying everyday things like going to school and going to the store as well. I was very proud of her. And then I realized that I somehow held myself together through the past few months, I had also survived. I was a little proud of me, too.